Unlearning Motherhood: A Conversation with Joelle Lahlouh on Rare Diagnoses, Autism, and Finding Strength
Apr 14, 2025
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If there's one thing I hear most often from families raising a child with a disability, it's this:
“I'm tired. I'm overwhelmed. I don't know if I’m doing enough.”
That fatigue — physical, emotional, and mental — is not something we can continue to shove under the rug. It's not just going to go away on its own. And waiting for life to somehow "get better" often leaves us stuck in survival mode, disconnected from ourselves and our power as parents.
This week on the All Brains Grow podcast, I sat down with Joelle Lahlouh, a mother who’s been through the unimaginable — raising her son Mounir, who has a rare genetic syndrome known as Coffin-Siris as well as autism. Her story is one of confusion, heartbreak, growth, and most importantly: resilience.
Rewriting the Script of Motherhood
Joelle speaks with raw honesty about what it meant to completely unlearn everything she thought motherhood would be. From NICU stays and medical mysteries to years of hospital visits and the eventual diagnosis that changed everything, she shares what it’s like to walk a path few understand.
She talks about the expectations she had for motherhood — shaped by family, culture, and past experiences — and the heartbreak of watching those expectations fall apart. But through that heartbreak came something more powerful: a new way of living, thinking, and loving.
The Healing Power of Fitness
What struck me most in our conversation was how Joelle found healing — not just emotionally, but mentally and physically — through fitness. It wasn’t about weight loss or body image. It was about reclaiming herself in the midst of burnout and breakdown.
She was given a choice: medication or movement. She chose movement.
Fitness became more than an outlet. It was her way back to clarity, strength, and the ability to perform — to make decisions, to show up, to feel good. And it reminded me how self-care isn't just about pampering or temporary relief. It’s about building habits that support our brain and body so we can make better choices every day — for our kids and for ourselves.
Performance vs. Pampering
This episode pushed me to rethink the difference between true self-prioritization and the kind of “self-care” we often default to. As Joelle put it, there’s a difference between rest and retreat. Between collapse and restoration.
She reminds us that prioritizing ourselves isn't selfish — it’s necessary. Because when we're drowning in stress and overwhelm, our ability to respond to our child with clarity, confidence, and compassion suffers too.
And when we move, when we heal, when we rebuild — we aren’t just changing ourselves. We’re reshaping what’s possible for our children.
